Sad

I'm a bit sad every now and again now. I think it's good, or at least healthy - I've not been sad enough.

It kind of feels like there's a big party that everyone except me is going to get to go to. And I can't go. And people will have fun and do things without me. And they might think of me every now and again, but I won't be there doing things with them. I'll just be a memory. And I don't want to just be a memory, I want to be there, I want to be in the middle of it all.

And so I'm sad.

I'm sorry Mama, I don't mean to make you cry.