Chemo
Well, it started, and boy did it suck.
We moved up to Brissie last Tuesday, and I've been pretty depressed and emotional. So glad my Mama is here to support me. When everything gets too much for me I just stop functioning and stare at the wall, and I'm so glad that Mama is here to pick up and keep going on.
On Monday I went in to have a portacath inserted into my chest. After an hour and a half of trying, the surgeon gave up. He couldn't get it into the right vein, it kept going up my neck artery, and he wasn't allowed to move my neck to pinch off that vein. So I came out bruised and swollen, with a new scar but no port. So on Tuesday I had a picc-line put into my right arm instead, which is like a permanent drip just above the elbow. It actually weirds me out a lot (it's stitched into the skin), so I keep in bandaged up. It's pretty good though, because it means no more needles, but I have to keep it dry, which makes showering difficult.
Tuesday afternoon I started chemo, and then had to stay overnight because I'd had two procedures (port and picc) in two days, so in order for the health fund to pick up the tab, I had to have an overnight stay (go figure - bureaucratic bureaucracy). So I did, and ended up staying till Friday. My haemaglobin levels are really low, so I had a blood transfusion on Wednesday, and the nausea and vomiting began in earnest then too, so I had to stay in to be hydrated, since I was keeping nothing down.
The first cycle of chemo is always a bit experimental - you don't know what side effects you'll have, and then they don't know which drugs will work on those side effects now. Hopefully we've worked it out a little now - there's one drug which seems to suppress the vomiting if not the nausea - so I feel like crap, but can keep fluid down. And another, dexmexadone or something, seems to be keeping the nausea under control, so I finally feel like a human being today. My concern with dexmex is that it's a steroid and will ultimately do very bad things to your body, so I'm trying to keep my dosages low.
It has been a truly awful week. Physically I have been feeling so bad, and emotionally pretty lousy as well. It's not a week I ever want to repeat. Thankfully I'm feeling okay this weekend, so I really hope that will continue. I will probably need some more blood on Monday, and my immune system will be completely down for most of next week, so I'll need to be very careful.
Next Wednesday night Brad, Jacqui and Rich arrive in Brissie for the Australia Day long weekend, so hopefully it will be a good relaxing weekend, hanging out at Jacqui's parent's place and showing Brad a bit of Brissie. I've also started having a weekly massage, and it really does help a lot.
Just wanted to post a quick update to let you know what's happening and also to replace the last rather depressing post. Not that this one is all that cheerful, but at least it's an update.
Hope to write again soon - internet access is very limited, but hope to post again soon.
Lots of love as always,
Jess
We moved up to Brissie last Tuesday, and I've been pretty depressed and emotional. So glad my Mama is here to support me. When everything gets too much for me I just stop functioning and stare at the wall, and I'm so glad that Mama is here to pick up and keep going on.
On Monday I went in to have a portacath inserted into my chest. After an hour and a half of trying, the surgeon gave up. He couldn't get it into the right vein, it kept going up my neck artery, and he wasn't allowed to move my neck to pinch off that vein. So I came out bruised and swollen, with a new scar but no port. So on Tuesday I had a picc-line put into my right arm instead, which is like a permanent drip just above the elbow. It actually weirds me out a lot (it's stitched into the skin), so I keep in bandaged up. It's pretty good though, because it means no more needles, but I have to keep it dry, which makes showering difficult.
Tuesday afternoon I started chemo, and then had to stay overnight because I'd had two procedures (port and picc) in two days, so in order for the health fund to pick up the tab, I had to have an overnight stay (go figure - bureaucratic bureaucracy). So I did, and ended up staying till Friday. My haemaglobin levels are really low, so I had a blood transfusion on Wednesday, and the nausea and vomiting began in earnest then too, so I had to stay in to be hydrated, since I was keeping nothing down.
The first cycle of chemo is always a bit experimental - you don't know what side effects you'll have, and then they don't know which drugs will work on those side effects now. Hopefully we've worked it out a little now - there's one drug which seems to suppress the vomiting if not the nausea - so I feel like crap, but can keep fluid down. And another, dexmexadone or something, seems to be keeping the nausea under control, so I finally feel like a human being today. My concern with dexmex is that it's a steroid and will ultimately do very bad things to your body, so I'm trying to keep my dosages low.
It has been a truly awful week. Physically I have been feeling so bad, and emotionally pretty lousy as well. It's not a week I ever want to repeat. Thankfully I'm feeling okay this weekend, so I really hope that will continue. I will probably need some more blood on Monday, and my immune system will be completely down for most of next week, so I'll need to be very careful.
Next Wednesday night Brad, Jacqui and Rich arrive in Brissie for the Australia Day long weekend, so hopefully it will be a good relaxing weekend, hanging out at Jacqui's parent's place and showing Brad a bit of Brissie. I've also started having a weekly massage, and it really does help a lot.
Just wanted to post a quick update to let you know what's happening and also to replace the last rather depressing post. Not that this one is all that cheerful, but at least it's an update.
Hope to write again soon - internet access is very limited, but hope to post again soon.
Lots of love as always,
Jess
posted by Jessie at 7:04 pm
2 Comments:
Ah, Jess, you really are a chin-up sort of a girl. It makes me so sad to read of your travails - 'justice' - what's that? Hope the amended chemical cocktail will be less distressing for you. So glad Jacqui and co. can come up to see you. Reithelen will welcome you again. Love Angela
Jess, you really are amazing and I'm so glad that you're able to have your Mum with you to help you through this really tough time. We're all thinking of you down here in 275 - level 27 is lacking some of it's spark! Hope the cocktail is easier going forward. Love Gill
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