The pandamonic joy that is my life
So where are we? Last Friday, just going into hospital for this straightforward procedure, right? Okay...
The surgeon went in and found that the cancerous plaque had also invaded the pancreas, not just the gall bladder. So instead of just poking a hole to let the gall sludge and bile and stuff drain away, he put a stent in - a little tube of some very expensive metal. (He says I now carry about three and a half grand in my chest.)
And the five percent chance the surgery will actually cause pancreatitis? Well, I hit it, of course. Pancreatitis. So I was in hospital until Wednesday night, in the end. It does mean that I made the right call about not going to Mackay for the Harley weekend, cause if I had the surgery on Monday, I wouldn't have been able to make it up to Mackay for Dave's citizenship on the 7th.
I spent the first twenty-four hours sick as an absolute dog - they gave me pethidine. I don't like pethidine much, it makes me sick. Give me morphine or fentanyl - fentanyl is my drug of choice. But what would I know - I'm just the patient right? The face that I've been doing this for five years now is irrelevant. ANYWAY, it took over twenty four hours for them to listen to me and get me off pethidine and onto morphine.
Most of the rest of the hospital stay is all blurry - morphine might not make me as sick, but it definitely makes me groggy and stoned and stupid. Very hazy for most of the stay. Jason came every day to spend time with me, Em came on the weekend and Dad Beata and Sophie came every night.
Towards the end of my stay I had finally got the morphine levels right, and then a new nurse came on and started giving me a higher dose. Unfortunately, cause I was so groggy I didn't work it out for most of the day.
Food was crap.
On Wednesday I realised that I hadn't had a blood test that morning (vampires come in at 5am each morning to stick pins in you. One morning it took two vampires and four attempts. One morning it felt like the vampire had just stabbed me with a potato peeler. They definitely vary in skill.) and that if I didn't have blood results for the day, there was no way that the surgeon would let me go home. So I upwardly managed, made the nurses call the surgeon to order a blood test, and got the vampires up. (He'd just forgotten to order it the day before. If I hadn't made it happen I would have had to spend another day.) He came in to see me that evening and said "We need to keep you in for another few days." I said "You ARE joking." He said "Yes, I am." So I went home Wednesday night :)
Which brings me to the next bit of pandemonic joy. I met with James Morton, my main oncologist here in Brisbane before all the surgery started. I also met with a new oncologist, Paul Mainwarring. Dr Mainwarring is working on a new approach that selectively targets the blood supply of tumours and cutting blood flow. He is going to go back to my original biopsy samples from five years ago and run some tests, and I might be a good canditate for some of the new treatments he is working on. So that is very exciting. I'll meet with him again in a couple of weeks to see what he's found.
On a slightly less positive note, the face that the cancer has infiltrated my organs and is causing problems like this pancreatitis and gall sludge is not a good sign. James strongly recommended to me that we bring the wedding forward. NOT because I'm not going to be here in November, but simply because he knows how important it is to me, and it is something I should do while I KNOW I'm healthy enough. He doesn't want to see me married in hospital. He just can't guarantee what sort of health I'll be in.
Another reason for us to bring the wedding forward is if I do start some experimental therapies with Dr Mainwarring, I don't want to start anything new or potentially disruptive to my life until after I'm married.
So... we've brought the wedding forward.
To Saturday 22nd September.
Yes, that's in two weeks.
So for the past week and a half, we have all been frantically wedding planning. And pretty much everything is now in place... or on track. It's been a completely crazy week - planning a wedding in three weeks is just crazy. But we are so happy and so excited - our magical day is now very close! And so much seems to be falling into place and just flowing. (Although a lot of stuff is being pushed into place by Amy, I think - not just falling!) It all feels just right and just perfect - this is going to be such a special day.
And in a couple of hours Jason, Emily and I are flying to Mackay for Dave's citizenship tomorrow. I will stay until Wednesday for Rhona's wedding and Tim's birthday on Tuesday. I am so happy that I'm well enough for this weekend - I haven't been up to Mackay in so long, and I'm really looking forward to taking up my new family to spend time with my existing one! And it will be wonderful to see all the English rellies too!
So as you can tell, my cup runneth over. It is just pouring over everywhere, like Niagra Falls. I am so very happy right now.
Thank you for sharing this journey with me.
May God bless you as richly as he does me.
With great great great love, in great joy,
Jessie xoxoxo
The surgeon went in and found that the cancerous plaque had also invaded the pancreas, not just the gall bladder. So instead of just poking a hole to let the gall sludge and bile and stuff drain away, he put a stent in - a little tube of some very expensive metal. (He says I now carry about three and a half grand in my chest.)
And the five percent chance the surgery will actually cause pancreatitis? Well, I hit it, of course. Pancreatitis. So I was in hospital until Wednesday night, in the end. It does mean that I made the right call about not going to Mackay for the Harley weekend, cause if I had the surgery on Monday, I wouldn't have been able to make it up to Mackay for Dave's citizenship on the 7th.
I spent the first twenty-four hours sick as an absolute dog - they gave me pethidine. I don't like pethidine much, it makes me sick. Give me morphine or fentanyl - fentanyl is my drug of choice. But what would I know - I'm just the patient right? The face that I've been doing this for five years now is irrelevant. ANYWAY, it took over twenty four hours for them to listen to me and get me off pethidine and onto morphine.
Most of the rest of the hospital stay is all blurry - morphine might not make me as sick, but it definitely makes me groggy and stoned and stupid. Very hazy for most of the stay. Jason came every day to spend time with me, Em came on the weekend and Dad Beata and Sophie came every night.
Towards the end of my stay I had finally got the morphine levels right, and then a new nurse came on and started giving me a higher dose. Unfortunately, cause I was so groggy I didn't work it out for most of the day.
Food was crap.
On Wednesday I realised that I hadn't had a blood test that morning (vampires come in at 5am each morning to stick pins in you. One morning it took two vampires and four attempts. One morning it felt like the vampire had just stabbed me with a potato peeler. They definitely vary in skill.) and that if I didn't have blood results for the day, there was no way that the surgeon would let me go home. So I upwardly managed, made the nurses call the surgeon to order a blood test, and got the vampires up. (He'd just forgotten to order it the day before. If I hadn't made it happen I would have had to spend another day.) He came in to see me that evening and said "We need to keep you in for another few days." I said "You ARE joking." He said "Yes, I am." So I went home Wednesday night :)
Which brings me to the next bit of pandemonic joy. I met with James Morton, my main oncologist here in Brisbane before all the surgery started. I also met with a new oncologist, Paul Mainwarring. Dr Mainwarring is working on a new approach that selectively targets the blood supply of tumours and cutting blood flow. He is going to go back to my original biopsy samples from five years ago and run some tests, and I might be a good canditate for some of the new treatments he is working on. So that is very exciting. I'll meet with him again in a couple of weeks to see what he's found.
On a slightly less positive note, the face that the cancer has infiltrated my organs and is causing problems like this pancreatitis and gall sludge is not a good sign. James strongly recommended to me that we bring the wedding forward. NOT because I'm not going to be here in November, but simply because he knows how important it is to me, and it is something I should do while I KNOW I'm healthy enough. He doesn't want to see me married in hospital. He just can't guarantee what sort of health I'll be in.
Another reason for us to bring the wedding forward is if I do start some experimental therapies with Dr Mainwarring, I don't want to start anything new or potentially disruptive to my life until after I'm married.
So... we've brought the wedding forward.
To Saturday 22nd September.
Yes, that's in two weeks.
So for the past week and a half, we have all been frantically wedding planning. And pretty much everything is now in place... or on track. It's been a completely crazy week - planning a wedding in three weeks is just crazy. But we are so happy and so excited - our magical day is now very close! And so much seems to be falling into place and just flowing. (Although a lot of stuff is being pushed into place by Amy, I think - not just falling!) It all feels just right and just perfect - this is going to be such a special day.
And in a couple of hours Jason, Emily and I are flying to Mackay for Dave's citizenship tomorrow. I will stay until Wednesday for Rhona's wedding and Tim's birthday on Tuesday. I am so happy that I'm well enough for this weekend - I haven't been up to Mackay in so long, and I'm really looking forward to taking up my new family to spend time with my existing one! And it will be wonderful to see all the English rellies too!
So as you can tell, my cup runneth over. It is just pouring over everywhere, like Niagra Falls. I am so very happy right now.
Thank you for sharing this journey with me.
May God bless you as richly as he does me.
With great great great love, in great joy,
Jessie xoxoxo
posted by Jessie at 9:44 am
10 Comments:
Dear Jess
Have finally found a proper PC so can drop you a line. I'm so pleased that you're going to have your special day on the 22nd. I honestly think that 3 weeks organisation time can get just as good a result as 3 months - you just have to get organised - which I know you are. And you've also got less time to stress out over whether the dresses will be right or the flowers or food done...it'll happen and it'll be great.
Sorry to hear you missed your Harley weekend and hope that Mackay has gone well. Will carry on with the candles
Lots of love, Gill and Jim.
Dear Jess
Am so excited to read that you going ahead with the wedding on the 22nd. Its such an exciting time and I know you will look radiant!
The new regimes for treatment sound promising and hopefull, fingers crossed and prayers are with you.
Looks like it will be dinner for four or maybe six? so I can celebrate your special day.
Take care, love, Maryanne.
A good Date; my birthday; if you hav e3 weeks to organize a wedding then it takes three weeks and will be just great! Enjoy!
Alison
Dear Jess ,
Am so excited for you that your cup runneth over, we look forward to your special DAY. An excellent idea confining preparation to 3 weeks. Love, prayers & good wishers Marion
hey Jess
words carnt explain how extatic i am for u about ur special day. 3 months or 3 weeks prep it will be so special for u all!
Read ur blogg every week u make me laugh an cry in the same line ur such a insperation an i admire u so much take care an enjoy the family bein over an im thinkin of u all an spesh on the 22... jan (kieths daughter) xxx
Hey Jess
Wow the 22nd! That's so cool! Wish I could be there - it will be an awesome day I'm sure! Hope you have one cracker of a Hens night as well! Make sure you take (and post) lot's of photos.
Lots of Love
Mark
Jess
We are so thrilled and excited for you. I have no doubt that you will put together everything that needs to be done to ensure that you will have just a beautiful day on the 22nd September. Please let us know if you need anything done for you. Hope you are enjoying Mackay, as I know you will, say hi to Ros & Mike. Look forward to catching up soon and look out for the Postie this week.
Love always and will ring this week.
Coleen & Warren xxx
Hey Jess
I am in awe! How wonderful it is that you have found the man of your dreams to marry! You are blessed, and that man above is defintely keeping an extra special eye on you!
And you are correct about the pancreatitis - my god it sux! I had it when I was 10 and I still remember vividly the vampires that used to stab me in the hope of finding a vein at 3am... however, I only suffered through a week of it... I can't even begin to compare...
Just wanted to drop you a note to let you know I am here and sending my prayers... and I will be thinking of you on the 22nd!
Nina
xxx
Yay for weddings and ridiculously good moods! Can't wait to meet you on Saturday. :)
God really does give us a boost when we need it most, doesn't He?
<3 Michelle (your soon-to-be sister-in-law)
Darling girl
How exciting that your wedding is happening this coming weekend. I wonder what time your ceremony is happening. I'm performing a wedding here on Saturday afternoon and will definitely be thinking of you as I celebrate with my couple when they take their vows.
I'm sure your special day will be the most blessed of your life as you and Jason formally make a new family together.
Dearest love from the Thursday night group and our hopes and prayers are with you that the new treatment is suitable for you and that it helps hugely with your ongoing health.
Jane xxx
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